D's Unconditional Love

"Unconditional love is known as affection without any limitations, it can also be love without conditions. This term is sometimes associated with other terms such as true altruism, or complete love."

Yesterday, while I was looking for D because he went missing for awhile I saw him entering our gate.  My blood really came to my head, because he went out of the house again unnoticed. Call me OA, but with the news of kidnapping and crimes nowadays, I am really prohibiting D to go out of the house. Daddy R is even teasing me "paarawan mo naman anak mo!". But no, I do not want to take any risk. Anyway, back to the story, when I am about freak-out, he came to me with a puppy face and gave me these little santan flowers and said "I got this for you mom!" My heart melts, and my preggy hormones made me wanna cry again. 

I hugged, kissed and thank him for giving me the flowers, but I told him not to go out of the house again, even if to get me some flowers. Then I put the flowers on the table. Come night time, when we are about to sleep I saw the pieces of the same flowers on the floor, I asked him to move over because  I will clean the room. he got the red pieces of the flowers one by one asked me "You like red lang mommy? eto oh!, ayaw mo na ba flowers? Sira na oh, kukuhanan nailing kita ulet bukas okay?". I felt so guilty. I don't know what happened at nakakalat ung flowers, but I really intend to throw them na, because I thought it was a kalat, but to the eyes of my son, it a gift that I should keep. I was more even moved, because he didn't mind me throwing those flowers, he'll just get some again, he forgave me without me even asking. 

Getting pregnant with babyS, the hormones and the scorching heat and all other factors made me sometimes impatient with D. I remember during the time I wasn't aware that I was pregnant, I always spank D because of little things, I feel guilty after, but then I will do it when he misbehave again. I even justify my acts telling myself that I am the mother, and I need to discipline my son. And every after my monster moments, D will hug me, still love me and be with me like nothing happened. I am still breastfeeding D at night, just to comfort him, I admit I sometimes resent him, but at the end of the day, he will come to me and tell me "I miss you mommy! I will always love you" and will shower me with lots of kisses and hugs. 

The saying "mothers love their children unconditionally" is true, but after contemplating, I realized, Mother do really love their children unconditionally, because their children showed them how to. 

Today, I prayed to God to bless me and my family bags and sacks of patience for our little man. He maybe 3 1/2 years old, eager to explore, would like to try to be an adult, break the rules all the time and test our tempers to the limit, but he still a child that needs to feel all the love from us, especially from me. I also pray that I may be blessed with the capability to raise my kids with love, so they grow up knowing the true meaning of love. 

G, 

Just Let it Be

I feel a lot better today, yes! the P hormones and stress at work and traffic transforms me into a monster sometime this month. I feel guilty though, that D has been the shock absorber. But the little man is full of love for mommy that he understands and very forgiving. I promise myself that I will do my best to make sure it will not happen again. So now this is my new motto in life, or until at least I pop. 

Make sense right? 

G, 

Learnings from our 6 years Journey

One of our pre-nup photo four years and 40 kilos ago. 

I had so much plan this weekend, but I ended up glued on our couch, watching TV, playing with D and texting/calling daddy R. This is our typical weekend when daddy R has work on a weekend. And we are like that for almost four years already. Tomorrow R and I will celebrate our 6th anniversary. Yes, I even computed ilang years na ba talaga kami? Haha we are like that, we don't usually celebrate our anniversaries and oftentimes we forgot about it. But that doesn't mean we love each other less, in fact for me thats true love. No rules, no boundaries, no limitations, no pretentions, just pure love. Naks sabi nga ni R "Mi, my love for you is priceless". 

We may look always a happy couple, we may show other people or on our social media accounts the happy and beautiful or little family is, but we also have a share of stormy seasons. Yes, I have the right to call our love "true love" because if its not, we will not have each other until now. And I know this will be forever.  

But having a relationship doesn't just exist because of true love, I believe that you have to work hard for it. And after 6 years of being a couple, I feel like we are stronger now than before. And happier of course. And I wanna share how we do it, what we decided and chooses to do for the love of each other. 

1. The Art of Compromising. When two people who came from different family and culture become together expect the worst. In the first months okay pa yan, honeymoon stage pa so both can give way. But after that, we start comparing our partners with our parents, ayan na! We or I learned it the hard way. But yes, compromising and meeting half-way is possible. Communication and honesty is the key. Be honest with your partner on what you both want, and accept the fact that hindi sa lahat ng oras gusto mo ang masusunod. Compromising is as easy as eating lunch sa gusto ng hubby mo, and mirienda naman sa gusto mo. And talk about the issue when both of you are calm. 

2. The Art of Communication. In our 6 years of togetherness, 4years is long-distance relationship. Although daddy R goes home every other weekend, LDr pa din yan! The thought of waking up not beside your loved one is sad and makes me feel alone at times,  But thank you to the unlimited plans, R made sure that we text, call and update each other on what we do everyday. It takes a lot of getting used to, pero masasanay ka din. We just make-up with the kwentuhan when he's here. 

3. The Art of Time Management. This one is the hardest. Being a working mom, with a toddler, and before breastfeeding and studying left no time for R. But good thing he understands,  but that doesn't mean he doesn't need me and I will stop making time for him. Ngarag diba? But whether we like it or not we have to alot time for our husbands. Remember that we used to revolve our world with them, kaya nga daw marami naghahanap ng iba. Even if we have D now, we make sure we sneak time for each other. 

4. The Art of Courting. This is more on R, he never stoped making me kilig in the 6 years we are together. And as Pope Francis said, never stop the illusion/love that you have when you are boyfriends/girlfriends. True naman, whenever R and I fight, I used to look at our pictures just to remember how happy we are. Then I fall in love to R again (yiheee!!). He never stopped calling me pretty, or never ceases to make me feel loved. 

5. The Art of Submission. Yes, as wives, we have to be. Its hard to live by it specially when you belong to type "A" personalities, but we have to trust and be with the decisions of our hubbies. Its a struggle for me, I know for some women as well, but we need to make sure that the man really manned the home. 

As we celebrate our 6th anniversary, note that this our original anniversary as bf/gf (we don't celebrate of wedding anniversary) I know that our journey will become more exciting and adventurous as he we learning from our mistakes and moving forward. Of course I look forward into growing old with R, but I am more excited in our journey into growing old. 

I hope you guys picked up something from us, you may want to add or share yours too. 

#iamsoblessed

G, 

Separation Anxiety

This was taken this morning, 9th day of workday in 2015 and D's 9th day of crying drama every morning I leave for work. He's clinging into my uniform and asking me not to wear it and get my everyday clothes instead. Breaks my heart, I want to sit with him and hug him. I want to give in to his request of sleeping again and snuggle each other the whole day. But I need to go back to reality, to work, and to chase my dreams for myself and for our family. 

This is not the first time D behaves like this. He do this everytime I am at home or when we go to La Union or in Pampanga or in different environment. In three years I became his security blanket, Oh well actually nursing with me became his security blanket. 

But he's a pre-schooler now and we need to help him outgrow his separation anxiety. And I don't want him to be Mama's boy. Daddy R asked me what to do, and as usual I asked Mr. Google and my trusty baby concerns source website Baby Center. They have a list on what to do when separation anxiety strikes. We are still in the process of limiting crying dramas, we are on trial and error mode but we are getting there. So you might pick-up something from these tips that worked for us. 

1. Wave bye-bye when you leave. It is a must to us to kiss each other whenever we leave for work. But I usually forget to wave bye-bye or even look back to him. Its heartbreaking for me and sometimes I just tell myself, "I'm doing this for D, so I need to be strong". Yes, may gunun na drama araw-araw. So now I need to make sure I bid bye to D. 

"It's a simple tactic but one that many parents ignore. Instead, fearing the wrath of their toddler, they try to sneak out of the house while he's otherwise engaged. Big mistake. This approach may save you the pain of watching your child cry, but it can actually make his separation anxiety more severe. If your child thinks you might disappear at any given moment without notice, he's not going to let you out of his sight. This also goes for nighttime departures. Some parents try to avoid the whole ordeal by putting their child down for the night before the babysitter arrives. That's all well and good — if he doesn't wake up. But suppose he does. You don't want him surprised — and possibly terrified — to wake up and find you gone."

2. Help your child look ahead. Sometimes, no matter how hard we explain to our child that we need to leave for work so we can provide him with food etc... their young minds cannot comprehend yet, but never quit trying. As D grew up, he's getting accustomed with daddy D leaving for Baguio to work, and me at the office. But then there are times that he can't absorb so I usually result to "pasalubongs stories". It works for sometime, but it became magastos and made D wait for the present other than me. So talk directly and honestly to your child, they can understand. Just be patient. 

"Although your child's ability to communicate is still hindered by his limited vocabulary, he understands much more than he can say. So prepare him for your departure by talking about the event ahead of time. Make sure your child knows where you are going and when you'll be back. You may also want to give him details, such as who will be watching him and what sort of activities he can look forward to doing. To that end, it's also important to talk about your child's sitter with great enthusiasm. Your child looks to you for reassurance, and if you say things like "I think Bella is so much fun, don't you?" he'll be inclined to agree. To gauge how much of your conversation he's absorbing, follow up with simple questions like "Where are Mommy and Daddy going?" or "Who's going to watch Kenny while Mommy and Daddy go to dinner?"."

3. Look on the sunny side. I also suffer separation anxiety, the emotions of leaving a wailing and crying baby must be also radiating with D so he's so dramatic every time I leave. Telling D the activities that we will do when I got home sometimes works, but I should be careful, D always remembers. lol

"Separation anxiety isn't merely a toddler thing — you may not be thrilled by the prospect of leaving either. But if you let your apprehension show, your child's almost certain to pick up on it. Besides, a dramatic farewell will just validate your child's feelings of insecurity. So try to stay calm and positive — even if he's hysterical. Talk to him evenly and reassure him that you'll be back soon. To keep the situation light, try adopting a silly parting phrase such as "See you later, alligator" or your own made-up alternative. Getting your child in the habit of responding with "After a while, crocodile" will also help serve as a distraction."

4. Head out at the same time. This we do ever since, and I think pretty worked for us because D actually see us leaving, never hiding somewhere. What I learned as I remember from my childhood is to always tell the kids the truth. So if you are leaving, no matter how they cry, tell them anyway, they will eventually understand and cope with it. 

"Good-byes are always easier when it's your child who does the exiting. Instead of you leaving him behind, have the babysitter take him for a quick trip to the park or out for a stroll as you head out the door. Make sure your child understands that you're going out as well. Otherwise he'll be doubly upset when he returns to find the house empty."

There are lots of tips and advices that you can get from the internet, chat groups and from your friends but always remember that these tips are hits and miss, trial and error and depends on your family. 

Good luck to us. 

G, 

R, My Mr. Right!

(Happy 67th mansary babe (R)! this post is for you, my Mr. Right! wink! wink!)

I got this article from the internet in Elite Daily during those lazy days that I cannot put myself into work a.k.a inspiring myself to work in spite of everything.  But I guess this article is God's way of telling me how blessed I am. Not all people found their happily ever after, so having a husband who is showering you with love day-in and day-out is such a big blessing. And I thank God a million times, for letting me meet R. Thank you, really... for having a man that I could be my enemy once in a while, but I could fall in love over and over again. 

_________________________________________________________________________

9 Signs You’ve Found The Man You Should Make Your Husband

There’s one thing we’re all chasing after. One force that trumps money, power or reason, and that very closely dictates the kind of people we become. And it’s love.

Falling in love is like coming home. Your worries are quieted and you feel protected in your partner’s arms. The man you give your heart to just feels right.

When you’re deep in love, it’s hard not to picture the rest of your life with that other person. But how do we know for certain that it’s real forever and not just a current fantasy?

Perhaps we’re a little old-fashioned, but we like to believe that marriage — for better or for worse — is sacred for life. Here are the nine signs you’ve found the man you want to spend the rest of your life with:

1. You don’t need to be “on” in front of him

Good days and bad days, he understands who you are and doesn’t expect you to be anyone but yourself. In his eyes, you’re special by just being you. There’s no pretending. Yes, I love that I can be who I am whenever I am with R, and he loves me in whatever mood I am.  

2. Your happiness is his happiness, and vice versa

You know he’s the one because he’s good to you in ways that you’ve never thought possible. He wants what’s best for you, even if it comes at a cost to him. Whenever I am happy, R is happier, and I am more happy in his achievements. I became selfless because of his love. 

3. Even at the end of a really bad day, all you want is to be with him

No matter what kind of crummy mood you’re in, you’d rather be with him than be alone, for you’re better with him than without him. Aside from baby D, all I need is a tight hug from R or even just to hear his comforting voice, nothing else. 

4. The attraction is palpable

Physically, emotionally and mentally, you two are compatible on all those levels. The chemistry between you both is powerful enough to block everything else out. Sometimes it feels like it’s just him that really matters. Surely, there are times that we don't agree on, but at the end of the day, we know how to compromise. But oftentimes, R lets me win! well, thats love babe!

5. You want to share every experience with him

When you envision your future, he has a major role in it (and vice versa). The idea of spending the rest of your life with him doesn’t scare you. Being by his side is where you feel most comfortable. Funny, but I don't buy my things without him ever since we became together. I feel like if there is one people I should look pretty, its him! Each others company is the perfect date for us. 

6. You have the same idea of romance

Sometimes you feel like you’re in a “Twilight” movie with all this inexplicable magic and love buzzing around. Whatever your definition of romance is — intimate dinners, long road trips, cuddling in bed — he shares in it and will go the extra step to make that happen. You would do everything to make your partner happy right? and it becomes your happiness also. 

7. You love more than you fight

It never feels good to fight because you care too much about him to hurt him. The compromise always seems like the best option because you both can be happy. But at the end of the day, you really can’t stay mad at each other for long. What I really love about R is that he can't stay mad at me. And even if he's so mad, he'll still check on me. Showers of love. 

8. He not only listens to you, but he also hears what you’re saying

He can read between the lines and anticipate your needs without you having to communicate them all the time. He’s thoughtful and well-intentioned like that. Sometimes I doubt, but he is. 

9. He accepts you as you are

You’re messier, louder and maybe less funny, but he loves you for it. He makes you feel good about all those things you might dislike about yourself. With R, I don't have to pretend I am happy, even if not. R understands my weaknesses and even loved every inch of it. 

I am a lucky girl. 

Source: 

http://elitedaily.com/dating/9-signs-man-marry/709958/

Why Babies are so Cute?

Do you wonder why your baby is so cute?

Do you wonder why God gave you a beautiful angel that erases your stress, worries, problems in just one smile?

Why are they so lovable? huggable?

Why do you need to carry them in your womb for 9 months, and you need to suffer sleepless nights just to feed them, to nurse them, to change their nappies and other mommy duties?

 A mentor told me "Because babies are designed to teach you as a mother and your husband to love unconditionally, to develop the bond with your child so that when they grow up your heart is overflowing with love that even if they get rebellious or disrespect you, so have more than enough love to understand, forgive and love them just the way you did when they are still your cutest baby". 

Agree? Make sense right? It's so true, sabi nga nila ang anak matitiis ang magulang, pero ang magulang hindi kayang tiisin ang anak. Whenever I look at baby D sleeping, I always wonder why am I given such an angel, considering all my boo-boos in life. Now I understand more why I have overflowing love for baby D, I am so blessed (of course with having R as well). And now I know why in the eyes of a mother, her baby is the most cutest and beautiful. 

Agree? share your thoughts why do you think babies are so cute?

Mommy Sweetie is back!!!

I know! I've been MIA for more than 2 weeks and forgive me for my negative vibes last post. Work and school was hell. Now I understand the sentiments of parents working hard to send their children to school, working students who wish for more extra hours a day and of working mothers. At kung ang drama ni R ay "ang hirap magpaaral ng matanda" ako naman ay "anghirap mag-aral ng matanda ka na!" hahaha. R sent me to school and because my semester is officially over yesterday... I am now waiting for my reward, my Tory Burch Bag! I worked hard for that, yan ang motivation ko everytime pagod na pagod na ako from work at may papers or exam ako haha #kababawantalaga.

I am now so near, yet so far in my impulsive dream. When I was young, I really wanted to be a journalist specifically a broadcast journalist yan talaga ang ultimate dream ko. But when I entered college I realized I wasn't for that field and enjoyed being in Development Work. I envisioned myself leading an organization where I can help and empower Filipinos makabayan talaga ang peg ko. But fate has other plans, just before my graduation, my family needed me to support them financially so I need to look for a job immediately and landed to a position in training/hr function and the rest was history. I realized that training has a lot of opportunities to offer, but it needs constant improvement, there will be a time that you need to reinvent yourself so you will always have the competency. At dun ko na naisip and impulsive dream ko, to be a licensed teacher. And let's see what will this new field has in store for me. For now, I am waiting for my grades, and then I'll see if I should take the LET exam this January na, #prayinghardforsign.

Anyway, why is my last post so negative nga ba? this blog is supposed to be full of positive vibes and full of happy memories of my family and baby D. Ayun na nga, I'm back to travelling again, well I like to travel, thats why I love my job pero iba na pala if you are a mom na. It's so hard to leave baby D even if 2-3 days lang, specially when he's sick. I felt so bad that I wasn't there to comfort baby D in times that he needed me most and sobrang nakakaguilty when I went home with a pattottie baby and muntik na ako hindi makilala #workingmommyblues talaga. Iniisip ko nalang, I need to work to provide him all he need and all he want. Yun lang, we know naman that material things are not enough so I made sure that every weekend or nightime is a quality time with baby D. Minsan lang sila dadaan sa cutest stage na yan, and I don't wanna miss it kasi i'm studying, kasi i'm working, kasi i'm tired ayoko ng gnun so now I'm really.. really learning how to handle everything and muntik ko na nga makalimutan may asawa din pala ako haha buti nalang mahal na mahal ako ni R. (love you babe..!)

The last 2 weeks was so eventful, I had a lot of learnings, realizations and cute stories of baby D that I want to share. And sana the long weekends coming and my migration to another lappy will enable me to update this nearly forgotten online diary of mine. I have a lot of plans. Sabi ko nga, I need to reinvent myself, haha sana naman this is not yet a sign of midlife crisis. No not yet.

Today, I realized that we all have the power to say no if we feel or know that we have reached our limits. We are just humans that has limitations and we should know when to stop.  Kagaya ng pagkain sa eat-all-you-can dinner, you should know when to stop even if there are a lot of food choices that you wanted to try. There will always be another time and one should know how to prioritize, kung ayaw mo magsuffer ng impacho haha. Seriously, we can only take so much within our plate, and getting work more than your limit will just compromise other work. So we should learn how to say NO.

Laters,

G