Thursday, 3 December 2015

Then, we are Four!

Hello there! Yes, babyS is here! Our little princess is now 12days and we couldn't be any happier because our little cutie is really a charmer.

And instantly our bed and hearts are full. 

DaddyR with his little darlings. 

Giving birth and raising these two will not be an easy task, DaddyR and I had our share of meltdowns for the first weeks of having two kids, but seeing them happy, healthy and smile makes all the pagod sa paglalaba, puyat, sweats and panis na milk smell worth it. 

For now, I may be MIA again so can I get the hang of taking care with my little cuties. 

Merry Christmas Everyone! 

Saturday, 21 November 2015

Realizations and Love


(photo grabbed from http://askdrnicole.com/a-mothers-love-endures/)

My baby Baby Center app says I am now 39 weeks and I have one day to go before the my due date. Weeks before today, I have always talked to summer to come out already, that everything is ready, we are all ready for her, but last night I realized that deep inside I am the one who is not ready. Since day 1 I knew I was pregnant, I am very vocal about my hesitations, my fears and apprehensions. As I thought I could get over all those ghosts through the nine months and much more prayers, I realized that no one and nothing can help me overcome my fears but myself. 

Last night, I cried a lot. I don't know if it must be hormones again, but reality awakened me. For the whole nine months of carrying babyS, I was too selfish to give her my full love and attention. I focused on my fears, my ambitions, my what ifs, my self plans and sacrificing my time with kuya D. I am always not ready for her because I am pre-occupied with a lot of things, afraid of the labor pains, without realizing that special gift inside me also needed me, my complete attention, my unconditional love and most importantly a mother's love. 

I realized that it is not enough for babyS to receive complete medical care for the whole 9 months, that I never missed my lab tests, vitamins and other exams but my little miss also needed and can sense my readiness for her. I was too selfish for telling her before to come out when I am ready, to come out when daddy R is her and telling her a lot of conditions before she come out. I am too selfish for asking her to delay everything because I no longer wanted to endure long hours at the labor room. For always requesting her to make everything easy for me, without even worrying if everything will be alright to my little one. God made me a mother again, because He knew I can do it, I can manage everything and yet I cannot accept how much I am blessed with another angel. 

I am so sorry for my baby for I am too selfish as a mother. I know, either today or tomorrow I will hold her into my arms. And this time, I will not waste anytime to show her how much mommy loved her, how much I am blessed to have her as a blessing in our lives. And hopefully, when she reads this in the future she'll know how much she taught mommy the true meaning of love even before she come out of the world. 

I love you so much babyS, and mommy now is ready to endure all the pains for you. 

Mommy G, 

My Journey



BabyS our ray of sunshine in my tummy, from 16weeks to 37weeks. 

As the famous line says, "What a journey it has been" I am now a bit nostalgic, sentimental and madrama! I survived 9 months of endless CR breaks, acid reflux and backache and all other things brought by the preggy hormones. But my life's mantra is "this will all pass" and true enough, halos hindi ko namalayan, I am about to give birth na! 

As I type this post, I am now 2-3 cm dilated and 50% effaced, I may not know what that exactly means in medical terms, but I know baby summer is so coming very soon! And I am so excited at the same time nervous for the big day. 

I will miss the priority lanes, the duck like walking, the little movements in my tummy, the adoring look of daddy R, my chubby fingers, feet and toes, and a lot more! But I wouldn't trade it for a baby's smell.

It may be a rough journey, I can't say I completely ready for baby summer but I can do it. 

Please join us in praying for a safe and healthy delivery. 

Mommy G,  

Wednesday, 18 November 2015

7 days a SAHM

Today marks my 7th day as a stay-at-home-mom. I took my early leave last week to maximize my unused SLs and VL and to prepare for baby Summer's arrival and spend time with kuya D as well.

Last days was full of different emotions, excitement, bliss that I had to spend more time with D, some nervousness and worries if baby summer is still okay. But I am lifting everything to His will.

I may have limited time to be a SAHM, but I am so grateful for the days I spend with D, for myself, and hopefully with Summer and daddy R before I went back to the corporate jungle again.

For the past days, I enjoy waking up with no alarm, snuggling with D. I also love the idea of no schedules to follow, I can nap whenever I want, I can eat anytime I want, I can watch and read anytime I want. Yes, I have having a great time being a SAHM.

This last week is also the longest time I spent with D since I got pregnant with S. Most of the time kasi I was too tired to play and talk to him because of work and pregnancy hormones. These past weeks I felt that we are lot closer to each other, we shared lots of hugs, cuddles, tickles and kisses. I literally spend most of the nights staring at him as he succumbed to sleep. I am so blessed to be loved by my little man. Daddy R would tease me about enjoying D's sweetness na mana daw sa kanya haha.

I also had time to clean our room, set up Summer's crib and arrange all her things. I am also also planning to throw all my life's trash haha as in all the aning anings I accumulated in the past years. Staying a home provided me time to organize my life lol.

So practically, everything is ready for Summer's arrival, yun lang I feel that it is me who is not yet completely ready. I need daddy R to be with me. I am not ready for the pain, but I am convincing myself that I did it with D so I can bear it again. I am also doubting myself if I am ready to be a mom of two kids, how will I manage my time and if I can really love them equally. But I am getting there, slowly as Summer is also preparing for her arrival.

As I count the days to my due date, where I have no choice but to have myself induced, I will enjoy my remaining days with D alone. And with prayers for a smooth, safe and healthy delivery.

Pray with me in this journey please?

G,

Tuesday, 3 November 2015

Superman's Trick or Treat 2015!

Since I am about to pop, we missed the travel to the province this All Saints Day, we usually go home  to the province to visit our departed loved ones. But as my OB said, "madami pang long weekends and holidays na darating. Stay at home muna for you and your baby's safety." Okay! so we stayed at home, and visit the mall nalang lol. 

And because in the province hindi uso ang halloween parties and costumes, D never experience it before. But don't get me wrong, masaya naman magbakasyon sa province, kumain, maglaro at dumalaw sa cemetery. It is actually a mini reunion pa nga. I miss the gang there, pero as the famous line says, "Everything happens for a reason", so we stayed in the city, medyo boring, but D experienced his first "Spooky Halloween Trick or Treat". I know ang haba ng title, si D ang nag-coin niyan. 

And because I was too lazy to move around, I actually never planned on joining any party, I also didn't prepared his costume. But the recycled superman costume that I bought in Divisoria for P250 was still a hit to my darling boy, so he's Superman! we bought the spider man mask at ocean park, he chooses it so hayaan na! We have D as the Super Spider Man! lol! And just joined free trick or treat party at the village and at SM Mall. Nakakapagod, but it is actually fun! I let D enjoyed all the candies he got, pinaghirapan niya yan kakasigaw ng "Trick or Treat!" haha, but the poor little man suffered toothache after. 

Trick or Treat at the Village. Actually, since it was initiated by the church, dapat saints and costume. Pero we are pasaway, haha bata naman!


SM Trick or Treat. He's so happy to see his fellow superheroes.

And when halloween party mixed with Santa. Hindi nakapagpigil si D na panic kay Santa. Lol

And because D saw other kids with the bongga make-up and costumes, he decided to make himself a zombie using Lola's Lipsticks. Haha and again roamed again in out street to do some last minute trick or treat. lol

So now, D can't decide whether he will be Batman or Papa Drack, or a Zombie next year. So I have 365 days to prepare! But he said, Baby Summer will be a baby princess. Sana hindi na naman ako magcram!

Mommy G,

Thursday, 29 October 2015

Manila Ocean Park

Me: D, we are going to Manila Ocean Park today,
D: Hindi, mommy, Philippine Ocean Park
Me: Ha? Hndi, Manila
D: Noh! Nasa Philippines tayo db? Philippine Ocean Park!

And witty talaga ng anak ko! hahaha

Anyway, one month before I pop, familia E trooped to Manila Ocean Park to explore and to also have some quality time with our panganay before bunso arrives. I got the promo from Metrodeal for P499 with 5 attractions.



So far, I am happy with my transactions with metro deal. I purchased in the morning and used the voucher in the afternoon. Good thing is also they have designated booths for vouchers users. Upon claiming your vouchers, they will provide you with the schedule of the attractions, so you could budget your time. We went there by 3pm and finished all the attractions by 8pm. There are lots of students with field trips so expect the chaos, but they have separate lines for walk-in guests. 




First Stop: Sharks and Rays Dry Encounter


Second Stop: Oceanarium

Someone is afraid of the large fishes, wants us to go home na aged agd! 

R, being also a first timer was also amazed with the big fishes. Me being the third timer was also happy seeing the fishes, but D was so afraid. 




But once we entered the small aquariums, with cute little fishes, D warmed up na and enjoyed the tour inside. Yun lang, he became so giddy that we cannot take even a proper photo.  











Third Stop : Jellies Exhibit

Next stop is a room, dark with mirrors and colourful jelly fishes. This is my first time to see this, and its amazing. Even D was mesmerised with the different shapes and colors and mirrors. 


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Fourth Stop : Sea Lion Show

At this point of the tour, we are a bit exhausted to take pictures. Haha But the show was fun! Yun lang you have to be in the front seats to really see the sea lions. Nonetheless, D was so happy and telling lots of stories about the tricks "wally" did. Sino si wally? hindi ko alam! There are boring parts, so we took a family picture (the most decent we had) to entertain ourselves. 


Fifth Stop: Symphony Evening Show 

This is the last show, and we almost ditched it out because we are so tired na, but when we heard saw some glimpse of it from the first show, we decided to wait for our schedule na din. And obviously didn't had any picture of the colourful fountains, lights and lights reflections. I was so aliw to watch kasi, and even D who was about to throw tantrums na that time went silent and focused on the show. Even R enjoyed the show and took videos. 

- - - -

There are more new attractions in the facility that the whole family can enjoy. Yup lang, it comes with the price. But there are free! like the  following...

Halloween display that you can take pictures. 

Small tree that kids can climb. 

D may not saw the penguins, but he saw a parrot! (in picture!) he is happy na!

One tip, make sure you bring your  own food. Because food are expensive inside. But I gave in to KuyaD's request even if the cornetto ice cream for P20, there costs P50! 

Overall, it was a sulit tour. Even if we woke-up with whole body ache the next morning. But hearing D's stories and happy hangover made it every muscle ache worth it.


And we took home a friend, "nemo" which D hugs every night. 


Mommy G, 

Friday, 16 October 2015

Working Mom's Problem #1

How do we explain to our child the reason why we need to work? 

I have shared before my everyday struggles of leaving D every morning. He would always grab my clothes and ask me to change into my pambahay, my bag or just throw a tantrum with a cutie puppy eyes telling me "Mommy wag ka na magwork please? dito ka nalang sa bahay please?" May drama pa yan na "Wag ka na alis, kasi namimiss kita!".   He would even sometimes cry from his heart. How can I say no to that? There are times that I give in, and just file a leave for a day.  But I can't do that everyday, I a work, with deadlines. 

Working mothers have different reasons why they need to work. Mine, aside from securing our family's financial status, I am not a domesticated woman, I can't even cook my favourite adobo dish. I believe that I am not destined to be a full time housewife, 4 days at home naloloka na ako.  But admit it, the little minds of our kids would not understand it right away. Gave lots of explanations to D, all sorts of having money to buy his toys, to travel, to buy food and a lot more. But he would still cry every morning. Ang sakit sa puso.

One night, just as I entered our gate, D came to me very excited. 

D: Mommy! hindi ka na papasok sa work bukas okay?
Me: ha? Bakit?
D: quasi may pera na ko, pambili toys, food, clothes. 
Me: ha? saan? saan galing?

Then he showed me this.  



D: Diba? Mommy madami na tayo pera.

I was speechless for moment, I just hugged him tight and kissed him. Grabbed an alkansya and told him to save his money, so we can have more. But honestly, I don't know how to respond. My little man finding ways to make me stay at home with him. Lola L told me he picked those coins from the corners of my drawers. I felt guilty again, for being so selfish of choosing to work, but I have to. And now that baby S is comming in a few weeks, I may need to rethink my choices again. 

What to do? 

G, 

Thursday, 15 October 2015

Smile October 2015


So we had our photoshoot again. I wanted to create a memory where babyS is still in my tummy. And I believe the best way to create a memory is capturing them thru pictures. #Pagbigyanangbuntis



R and I are so blessed. Don't you guys agree? 

Mommy G, 

Thursday, 1 October 2015

D's Birth Story

Few days from now, I will turn 8th months pregnant with babyS. One month to go before the BIG day. And I couldn't contain my excitement, nervousness and all other emotions, which keeps me awake at night (sigh!). But I just decided to let go of those ghosts and leave everything to God's plan. I know, I am in good hands. And as daddy R told me, "Nakaya mo nga kay D, e di mas kaya mo na ngaun kay S". May point siya right?! So instead of worrying, I decided to just remember how I brought a wonderful baby boy into the world, last January 18, 2012. 

Yes, this was almost four years ago, but my memory on my 22 hours at the labor and delivery room was still vivid, until the time I heard and saw my little boy, crying his lungs out! My OB said, "Sabi ko na nga, paghawak ko pa lang sa kanya, alam ko ng makulit tong bata na to!", now I am excited about her prediction with S.  

One week before the D day, a saturday to be exact, my OB said I was 1cm dilated. That got me excited, pero as my OB said, I can still go to work, as long as I don't feel any pain in the morning. So I still went to work for the rest of the week. I was desperate to deliver D via painless normal delivery, so nagpatagtag talaga ako. 

The next saturday, I was 3cm. Still no pain. My OB asked me if I wanted to be admitted, I still refused, I wanted to feel the pain or actual labor before going to the hospital. 

On monday, I went back to my OB, I was 5cm then. Still no pain. my OB even panicked that I was alone during the check-up. She's then pleading me to be admitted. But I insisted to wait for the pain, mala movie ba? ung maiiyak ka talaga sa pain. So then we agreed just to update her, when I felt the pain I was expecting. Then when I got home, there's the bloody show, but still no pain. Only the occassional tightening, and some back pain. I didn't sleep the whole night because of anticipating the pain, and for the big day. Daddy R is in Baguio, and also waiting for my go-signal to come home. 

Tuesday morning, being impatient that I am. I decided to gave the signal to R to go home. To be admitted, get the medications to speed up my labor process. I hated the waiting game and succumbed to my anticipations. Tried to walk around the village pa while waiting for R. By 4pm we were at the hospital, and I am still 5cm! I was wheeled to the labor room, with the tests, IEs etc. I envy mothers who are being transferred to the delivery room one by one. But I just kept on praying and sleeping lol. Still no pain. I even slept thru the night, just occasionally waking-up if they need to do some test and IE. but still no progress. I could hear the nurses talking about my slow progress, and only if I can reach the 6cm mark, they will do a technique to help me. 

Wednesday morning. Still in 5cm. Still no pain. By 10am, by OB arrived, popped my water bag. Kept on telling me that we can still do normal delivery as planned. (But later on, Papa said they were advised that if no progress until 2pm, they might to an emergency CS since I am also running out of water, which might put us in danger) By 11am after they broke my water bag, I finally felt the most anticipated pain. But still tolerable. Sideways position and deep breathing still helped. They hooked me into a monitoring machine, and by 1pm, after they performed an IE, I heard the nurses calling my OB and some staff to prepare me to the delivery room. And finally, this is it! At the delivery room, I met my anaesthesiologist and all other nurses, busy prepping me, but I couldn't care anymore because from time to time I feel the pain from my tummy to my back, like 5x of a menstrual pain. They taught me how to push, but I just do whatever my body dictates me. Then my OB said, "It's time, push whenever there is a contraction". 

1st attempt  --- failed, 
2nd attempt --- something in the bed fall out! they all laughed, umeeksena din daw kasi hung foot rest. 
3rd attempt --- everyone is silent waiting for my contraction, pero antagal dumating. Then finally, I shouted (yes, sumigaw talaga ako) "Ayan na!" 

And after one last strong and long push, I heard D's cry. I saw him crying, my beautiful baby boy came to the world at exactly 2:11pm. I didn't know if I cried too, but I feel asleep after. I remember waking up and sleeping again a couple of times feeling the stitching, cleaning and changing my hospital gown. My OB said they did the unang yakap, but I barely remember it. D crawled to my breast and feed himself immediately daw. 

I woke up from a dream full of colors and rainbows by 3pm. Just then I realised I survived the battle. I thank God, and Lolo D for the guidance, and look for the nurse because I feel so sore down there. She assisted my and told me that I will be wheeled to my room by 4pm. That was the longest wait for me. I still remember watching the ticking of the clock. 

Then by 4pm, I was reunited with daddyR and then finally with our first born D. 


Now, I know better with S' delivery. I believe that I am more prepared now. But then again, I lift everything to God's plan. So please continue praying for me. 

G, 

Monday, 28 September 2015

D's Unconditional Love


    "Unconditional love is known as affection without any limitations, it can also be love without conditions. This term is sometimes associated with other terms such as true altruism, or complete love."

Yesterday, while I was looking for D because he went missing for awhile I saw him entering our gate.  My blood really came to my head, because he went out of the house again unnoticed. Call me OA, but with the news of kidnapping and crimes nowadays, I am really prohibiting D to go out of the house. Daddy R is even teasing me "paarawan mo naman anak mo!". But no, I do not want to take any risk. Anyway, back to the story, when I am about freak-out, he came to me with a puppy face and gave me these little santan flowers and said "I got this for you mom!" My heart melts, and my preggy hormones made me wanna cry again. 


I hugged, kissed and thank him for giving me the flowers, but I told him not to go out of the house again, even if to get me some flowers. Then I put the flowers on the table. Come night time, when we are about to sleep I saw the pieces of the same flowers on the floor, I asked him to move over because  I will clean the room. he got the red pieces of the flowers one by one asked me "You like red lang mommy? eto oh!, ayaw mo na ba flowers? Sira na oh, kukuhanan nailing kita ulet bukas okay?". I felt so guilty. I don't know what happened at nakakalat ung flowers, but I really intend to throw them na, because I thought it was a kalat, but to the eyes of my son, it a gift that I should keep. I was more even moved, because he didn't mind me throwing those flowers, he'll just get some again, he forgave me without me even asking. 



Getting pregnant with babyS, the hormones and the scorching heat and all other factors made me sometimes impatient with D. I remember during the time I wasn't aware that I was pregnant, I always spank D because of little things, I feel guilty after, but then I will do it when he misbehave again. I even justify my acts telling myself that I am the mother, and I need to discipline my son. And every after my monster moments, D will hug me, still love me and be with me like nothing happened. I am still breastfeeding D at night, just to comfort him, I admit I sometimes resent him, but at the end of the day, he will come to me and tell me "I miss you mommy! I will always love you" and will shower me with lots of kisses and hugs. 

The saying "mothers love their children unconditionally" is true, but after contemplating, I realized, Mother do really love their children unconditionally, because their children showed them how to. 

Today, I prayed to God to bless me and my family bags and sacks of patience for our little man. He maybe 3 1/2 years old, eager to explore, would like to try to be an adult, break the rules all the time and test our tempers to the limit, but he still a child that needs to feel all the love from us, especially from me. I also pray that I may be blessed with the capability to raise my kids with love, so they grow up knowing the true meaning of love. 

G,